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WHAT IZ THIS ? - ABHISHEK

my self \"abhishek raj\" i am from ARA (BIHAR) but now in NAGPUR..

dosto mujhe surur se hi mastia kerna pasand tha ye pyar wyar kya hota hai mujhe ptaa hi nai tha infact janna v nai chahta tha mere sare dost ki G.F thi kuch un se pyar kerte the to kuch TP jab mai unki halet dekhta tha to mujhe ajib sa lagta tha , mai unki lyf se nfert kerta tha mai sochta tha ki ye pyar wyer kuch nai hota fir ye apni lyf Q waste ker rehe hai,,, tb mere dost bolte the ki tujhe tbtk iski value feel nai hogi jb tk tu kisi se pyar nai kerta aur mai unki bato pr jor jor se hasta....aur yahi sochta ki itz never possible ....per mujhe kya pta tha ki..........

aaj v mujhe wo din yaad hai jab mai 10 ka exam deker dosto ke sath masti kerta tha ki acchank mujhe 28 march 2008 ko ladki dikhi wo kaisi thi/hai shyed mai ye nai bta sakta Qki utne sabed nai h mere pass ye shyed 1li ladki thi jise maine continue dekhta reha tbtk dekhta reha jbtk wo mujhe cross kerke n chali gai coz hum ek-dushre ke opposite direction me ja rehe the,, 1 pal ke liye mujhe laga ki meri duniya hi badal gai hai fir maine apne sir pr 1 halki si champet di aur aage ko nikel gaye,,ha ager mere sath mere dost nai hote to shyed mai uska picha jrur kerta jiska mai bhut 1le se hi khilaf tha pr aaj wo mai sab kuch bhul chuka tha...ys sab mere dosto ne watch kia pr us wqt kuch nai bola.
ab to meri halet paglo si ho gai thi maine use n jane kaha -kaha n dhundha her gali muhele me serch kia pr wo mujhe wo khi nai mili ,ab mere dost mujhe pagle bolte the aur bs mai yahi bolke reh jata tha ki kvi kisi se sacha pyar kerke dekho fir smjh me ayega...wo sab mzak udate the ...tbtk hmara result aagya result ache the mere sare frindz kota ,delhi ,ptana chale gaye mujhe v jana tha pr mai uski wjh se nai jaa saka is baat se mere papa mujh pr gusssa to nai pr khuss v nai the Qki mai khud hi unse kota jane ki req ki thi aur unhone sari tyari v kerdi thi aur maine last time pr mna ker dia ye soch ker ki khi n khi to dikhegi n,,,,aur isi aasha me maine pure 1 sal waste kerdia . aur fir maine ye man lia ki khubsuret ladki ladki nai balki asma se aai hui koi pari thi ,jiske khubsurti pr mai fidda hu jise hum pyar nai bol sakte ,ise to sirf 1 aterction hi bol sakte hai aur maine khud ko koste hue ptna jane ko fasla kia age ki study ke liye i mean 12th ke liye.....aur mai chala gya....
waha jane ke bad pta chala ki mai use abtk nai bhula pya hu . bich 2 mai apne gher aya kerta tha . 1 din jb mai gher aya aur mai apna bag gher pr rekh dosto se milne ja reha tha ki achanak mujhe wo ladki fir se dikhi wo v meri di ke sath jiska name(___) hai mai to khusi ke mare pagel ho gya ye mere coin ka 1la pahlu tha 2re phlu me mai utna hi dukhi tha actuaaly us se jyada Qki mai ab sirf use dekh sakta tha pr kuch bol/ ker nai sakta tha ha pr yehi mere waste kam nai tha ab mai sab kuch bhul siwaye use study kerne . laga is bich maine apni di se uska name & uska clony ,caste famly sab kuch jann lia sabse badi baat to ye thi ki wo mere caste se belong kerti thi wo v 1 bhut achi fmily se .... fir humne....xam dia iit & aieee dia .....per ache rank nai aye mere papa ne fir mujh se bola khi jane ko maine bol mai yhi rehunga jo kerna hoga yhi se kerunga ....wo fir meri di ke sath 1 hi clg me admi. lia aur mujhe to AIEEE ki preparing kerni thi so maine nai lia..pr use dekhne ka mauka kvi v waste nai kerta ,dhire -dhire mai us se msg texting kerne laga actually mera sim uninor ka hone ki wajh se jb v di ko baat kerni hoti thi to wo mere hi celll se baat kerti is wjh se use laga ki ye nb v gher ka hi hai aur jb msg jata to sochti ki (___) ka hi usi ne veja hoga aur wo meri bato ka funny ans deti ,,,uski baate uska hsna uska thought about oll matter kafi waghtfull tha aur mai uska diwana hone laga ab to wo hi mera sab kuch thi ,,,,achank jane kaise use meri chitin ka pta chala aur fir mere di ko jis wajh se mujhe kafi kuch sunna pdda ...fir admission 1 ache clg me ho gya aur mai nagpur chala aya is bich maine uska id lene ki bhut kosis ki bt wo mujhe meri di ki wajh se nai mila Qki ager wo chahti to mujhe mil sakta tha pr asya nai hua aur mai khud ko kosta reha...fir mere 1 dost ne btay ki tum use fb pr dhundho wo mil jayegi us wqt mai fb se bhut nfret kerta tha fir maine apna a/c bnya aur use bhut serch kia pr wo mujhe nai mili is bich meri dosti as rong nb 1 ladki se hu thi jo mere di aur uski common fr! ind thi actully maine us se dosti hi usi ki wajh se ki thi fir maine indirectellly uska use /sath lia fir v koi option nai tha aur 1 din mujhe uska profil mil hi gya fir maine use frind req veja pr wo use accept nai ki fir maine dushra id bnya aur us se req veja wo date tha 11 nov 2011 aur finellly 14 nov ko usne mera req accept ker hi lia ...suru me maine us se apni pahchan chupai is der se ki jb use pta chelega ki mai hi hu to mujhe unfrind ker degi ..fir hmari bate hone lagi aur use saq hone laga ki khi mai use janta to nai hu n aur finellly use maine bta dia ki mai kon hu aur sath hi sath 1 aur jhuth bola ki maine use anjane me req veja hai jo nai kerna chahiye tha.....fir hmari bate hone lagi humm jhgde bhut jayada kerte the actuaallly mai hi kerta tha fir velentin day week aya aur usi wqt hmara midsem xam tha so maine use sari dayz 7 feb ko wish kerke apna id deactivate ker dia jo shyed use acha nai laga mera is terh wish kerna aur isi bich mujhe use 1 bhut jaruri msg dena tha so maine use call kia jo ki uske gussa me ghee ka kam kia usne mujhe sms se msg chda ki use mujh se koi baat nai kerni ,,,ye baat mujhe bahut buri lagi fir v mai uske bina nai reh sakta tha so mai us bat ko bhul gya ,,,,,sry bola fir se hum baat kerne lage ....aur 1 din maine (date nai bta sakta rezion h ) use frindship ka hath bdhya to usne mere samne 3 sert rekhe 1la kvi v mai us se felrting nai keruga Qki use felrting kerne wale boyz bilkul hi nai psand hai 2ra mai kvi v us se jhuth nai bolunga,,,, aur 3ra boli thi ki mai use jb jarurt hoga tb bolungi ,,,,,aur maine ye sari serte man lia aur vade ki mutabik maine use se kvi v jhuth nai bola hum hmesha 1hrs dally chat kerte hai,, fir mujhe samjh me nai aat ki kya wo mujh se love kerti hai ? kya mai use perpose keru ? kahi maine use perpose kia aur wo mujhe na bol de aur mujh se dosti v tod le to kya mai zinda reh paunga ?
DOSTO MUJHE APKI HELP CHAHIYE q KI MUJHE SAMJH ME NAI AA REHA H KI MAI KYA KERU USE PERPOSE KERU YA FIR ISI TERH HMESHA DOST BNA REHU,,,,,,,,?







2 comments:

pradyuman said...

go and tell her about your feeling jo apke mann me uske liye hai bcoz true love happens only one time in life. So dont waste your time.
Aur use jhoot mat bolna bcoz love me apko partner ki respect karni chahiye.
All the best...

Anonymous said...

bol do...i'am sure she l0ves yew...d0nt fear...

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